


Looking Backwards And Moving Forwards

by afteriwake



Series: Just A Little Bit [9]
Category: Doctor Who, Sherlock (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-04
Updated: 2013-12-04
Packaged: 2018-01-03 12:19:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1070401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/afteriwake/pseuds/afteriwake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Amy has a row with Rory after he's dropped a few bombshells on her so she goes over to Sherlock's home to forget. He offers conversation and comfort, which then escalates into a very passionate interlude, and when it is over they take another step in their relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Looking Backwards And Moving Forwards

**Author's Note:**

> The final story in the onslaught of spamming for this series, based on another **imagineyourotp** prompt ("Imagine person A of your OTP upset and angry almost to the point of tears following a blazing row with their ex over the phone. Person B feels bad and decides to cheer A up with cuddling, which soon turns into rough, messy cathartic sex, mostly to make A feel better. Afterwards, person A curls up in person B's arms and falls fast asleep while person B strokes their hair and kisses them on the forehead gently"). I know Rory is usually a nicer guy than he's portrayed in this story, but keep in mind they didn't have the easiest of divorces in this AU.

She was in a foul mood and wanted to hurt someone. No, scratch that, she just wanted to curl up in a ball and cry just as much as she wanted to punch something. He _had_ to contact her. When things were going well and she had her life back together and was finally happy again Rory had to ruin it all. And that probably hadn't been his intention at first; the initial conversation had been civil even if her responses had been icy. Then he'd dropped the bombshell and River got dragged into it and then the Doctor and it escalated from there. She had hung up on him just to get out of the argument with a shred of dignity left.

She was grateful it had happened while she was at home and not at Sherlock's. Oh, God, if she had had to have _that_ conversation in front of Sherlock she'd have pushed him away at the end of it and probably gotten into an argument with him too. She didn't want that. It had been a long time since she was happy, and even if her relationship with Sherlock was only seven months old and they were still feeling things out it made her happy, happier than she had been since she and Rory started having problems. She had gone years feeling miserable, losing herself in one rotten relationship after another. This was a relationship worth keeping, this whole thing with Sherlock, and she didn't want to fuck it up the way her and Rory's marriage had gotten fucked up.

She paced around her flat for a bit before giving up and heading to Sherlock's. Maybe if she got there she'd calm down. Hell, if nothing else she could have blistering hot sex and just forget for a bit. That sounded like a good plan to her, just kissing him the moment she got to him and making him go to his bedroom and shagging until she forgot. He'd probably go for it, too, if he wasn't in the middle of a case. That was one of the things she could count on with him. She tried the front door and found it was locked. She frowned slightly; normally if someone was home it was unlocked. She just hoped he was home. Her plan wouldn't work if he was out. She dug out her key and let herself in, immediately picking up on the sound of violin music. For some reason he must have wanted privacy but at last he was home. That gave her pause, though. If he'd locked the door maybe he didn't want to be bothered. But the violin music stopped after a moment. “John? Did you come home?” Sherlock called out from the sitting room.

“No, it's just me,” she called back, heading to the stairs. She went up them and then walked into the sitting room. “Sorry if I'm bothering you.”

“You aren't bothering me,” he said, lowering his violin. “I was just composing a new piece.”

“Really?” she asked, forgetting for a moment how angry and miserable she was. He didn't play for her often, at least not his original compositions. “How close are you to being done?”

“Almost finished,” he said. “I've been working on it since early this morning. I woke John up with it and he was in a cross mood when he left.” Then he took a good look at her. “You look as though you're in a foul mood, too.”

“Well, I had a lovely chat with Rory about thirty minutes ago,” she said sourly as she sat down in the chair that was basically hers now. She had told him some details about their relationship but not everything, only the things that didn't hurt. And to be honest, even over two and a half years later there was a lot that still hurt. “He told me he was getting married again. That part kind of shocked me, and then he dropped this huge bit of news and then River and the Doctor got brought into it and we just got into a huge row over the whole thing.”

“I'm sorry,” he said, coming over to her. “Do you want to talk about it?”

She shrugged and pulled her feet up onto the seat, resting her chin on her knees. “I guess I didn't think he'd move on so quickly. He's been with the same woman since about three months after our divorce was finalized.” She paused. “The kicker was she's pregnant. Two months along. He's getting what he wants, a child to raise.”

“You want the same, don't you?” Sherlock asked quietly.

“I didn't think I did. I thought it would hurt too much after losing Melody. And maybe I still don't. I don't know. It just hurts that he gets what he wants and then he had to call me and tell me. We're not friends, not really. I don't care about his life now. He shouldn't have called.” She looked down at the floor. I'm happy with my life now, with you and the modeling and the cases. It's a good life, it really is. But...there's a lot I want and I don't know if I'll ever get it.”

“What do you want?” he asked, sitting in his chair and looking at her.

“I want to try and get married again. I liked being married. And I might want a kid. Just because I can't physically have another child doesn't mean I can't adopt or something. There's all sorts of children who need good homes.” She looked over at him. “Do you want any of that?”

“I haven't thought about it, to be honest,” he said slowly. “But...with you I do not think I would be adverse to any of it. I might not be the best husband or the best father, but I could see myself trying.”

Her eyes widened in surprise. "I would have thought you'd balk at it outright.”

“Neither of those things sound that bad, I suppose, even though I know we're not ready for either quite yet.” He paused for a moment, as though he was gathering his thoughts. “We may not have been serious for very long, but you should remember that I was attracted to you more or less from the moment I met you, even if you despised me the first six months we knew each other. That was all my fault. I had made a complete mess of everything by putting distance between us, but I had wondered what might happen if I attempted to at least become your friend. I did not think I would be lucky enough to get more than that. And when we began to be intimate, I found myself wanting more almost immediately.” 

“It's been so long since I've been with a guy who actually likes me that much,” she said with a small smile. “Most other guys didn't care enough. And I'll admit, for a while I didn't think too highly of myself. I let them walk all over me.” She lowered her legs and put her elbows on her thighs, resting her chin on her knuckles and looking at Sherlock. “Do you love me?”

“I do,” he said quietly. “I was just waiting for a time when it seemed appropriate to tell you.”

“Did you ever think you would fall in love?”

“No, I did not,” he replied, shaking his head.

“I think love you too. I'm not sure. I feel strongly for you, I know that much. I'd do anything for you, really, but I don't know if I can say I'm in love yet. Is that okay?” she asked.

“I can live with that.” He looked at her closely. “Do you want to lay down for a while with me?”

“Yeah, I would like that a lot,” she said with a nod. “It would be good to be close to you right now.” She stood up at the same time as he did and they made their way to the bedroom. Whenever she stayed over she slept on the right side of the bed and she went over there. She slipped her shoes off and put her glasses on the nightstand before laying on top of the covers because she wasn't planning on going to sleep. He shrugged out of his suit jacket and draped it over the back of his chair before taking his shoes off. When he was done he slipped into bed next to her and pulled her close against him. “I feel bad that you can't finish your violin piece,” she said after a few moments.

“It will keep for now,” he murmured near her ear. “You need this more than I need to finish it.”

She was quiet for a moment, and then she turned to face him. He still kept an arm draped over her and began rubbing her back. “I'm glad we're together,” she said. “Rory made me happy for a long time, but at the end it just wasn't there. We both fell out of love. I didn't think I'd be happy in a relationship again. And definitely not with you.”

He grinned at her. “I certainly didn't help matters.”

“If you had asked me eight months ago whether I'd be with you or John I'd have said John,” she said with a slight chuckle, surprised that she even wanted to laugh. “I'd have had a lengthy diatribe against you, too, if it was before the day I slapped you.”

“We have been together eight months now, haven't we?” he mused.

“It was eight months ago we started sleeping with each other and seven when we started dating. And you came back six months before that so that makes it a little over a year we've been in each others lives.”

“It's strange that everything is so different now,” he said.

“But in a good way,” she pointed out.

“Definitely in a good way.” He moved closer to her. “I never expected any of it, but I'm glad for it.”

“I am too,” she said. She moved close enough so their bodies were pressing. “Since the divorce you and John were the best things to happen to me. I don't think I'd like the woman I'd be if I hadn't met him or we hadn't gotten together.”

“Then I am glad John met you, and that I met the Doctor and he told me about you,” he murmured.

She smiled at him before leaning in and kissing him softly. He really was a good man, she knew that deep down. Maybe one day they would have everything she wanted them to have. And she did realize she wanted it with him and no one else. Maybe she did love him after all. She'd have to think about it more. He deepened the kiss after a few moments and she let him. After the talking she would have been happy just letting him hold her. Just being close to him was helping so much, but this would help too. 

She moved her hands to his chest and began undoing the buttons of his shirt. She realized her hands were shaking slightly. She hadn't been nervous with him in so long that this surprised her. And she could feel his hands trembling as well as he began to pull her shirt up. Perhaps their admissions to each other had signified a change in their relationship. She got his shirt undone first and pulled it up out of his pants, pushing the shirt off his shoulders. He pulled away from her and sat up, getting it off as quickly as he could. While he did that she sat up as well and pulled her own shirt off, tossing it to the side and leaving her in just her bra. He moved over to her again and kissed her passionately, reaching behind her to undo the bra, fumbling slightly as he did. She pulled away slightly as he got it undone and pulled it off, tossing it in the same general direction as her shirt.

He moved them both so he was on top of her, and she dug her nails into his shoulder when he pulled away from the kiss and began to nip at her skin. He made his way towards her neck, then further down to her breasts. He let his teeth graze her left nipple before he bit down. She arched up underneath him and dug her nails in even more. She knew he didn't mind pain, and frankly neither did she. “Other side,” she said throatily, tipping her head back. He obliged and she moaned at the action. Then he pulled away and began moving down her stomach, biting down at various points.

Even though it was cold she had worn a skirt that day with tights underneath. He pulled away from her and she lifted her hips up. He reached behind to undo the zipper, and then he pulled her skirt off her her. After he tossed it to the side he moved back up, hooking his fingers in the waistband of her knickers and pulling them and the tights off, leaving her naked. He quickly stripped the rest of his clothes off and came over her again. She spread her legs open and he reached down between her legs to make sure she was ready. Finding she was he positioned himself and thrust into her. She gasped and bit into his shoulder, hard enough to leave teeth marks. She wanted him just as badly as he wanted her right now, and if it was rough and fast that was fine.

He pulled out and then thrust into her again, and she found herself clinging to him. He filled her completely with each thrust, going deep. This reminded her much of their first time together, where she had clung to him for the ride of her life. She grasped his shoulders as he rocked into her, feeling a slickness beneath her fingertips and knowing she had drawn blood. She moved her hands away and ran them down his back, scratching hard. He retaliated by thrusting into her even more forcefully, and she found herself on the edge of an orgasm fairly quickly. And then it spilled over and she screamed in pleasure, and she felt him join her moments later. They were both panting at the end of it, and she lifted her head up slightly to kiss the teeth marks she had left on his shoulder.

“I am sorry I was not more gentle,” he said, hanging his head slightly as he pulled out of her.

“It was fine. I wasn't all that gentle with you,” she said, moving her hands away from his back and framing his face in her hands. “I drew blood by clawing your back. I'm sorry.”

“I actually enjoyed it,” he said with a slight smile. “I don't think it's been that intense since our first time.”

“It was different this time, wasn't it?” she said quietly after a few moments of silence. “Different than it usually is?”

“Yes, it was. For better or worse, our relationship is changing.”

“I think it's for better,” she said.

“As do I,” he said before sitting up slightly and reaching for the blanket he kept on the end of his bed that they had nearly knocked off. He put it over them and then pulled her close as they faced each other. 

She reached up to touch his face gently. Now would probably be a good time to bring up what she'd been thinking about since Christmas, since just after he gave her the necklace she still wore every day. “If I ask you a kind of out there question, will you think about it?” she asked quietly.

He nodded slightly. “What do you want to know?”

“How would you feel if I said I wanted to move in here?” she asked. “I can rent one of the other rooms, maybe. That way we still have some space. But I really hate going home. It's not even really home. This place...I like being here more.”

“You could move into another room,” he said slowly. “Or you could share mine with me. I would like it very much if you did that instead.”

She had thought he'd want them to have other rooms, at the very least, because sharing a room meant their relationship was more serious than before. It would mean they were really committed to each other. But she should have known better, based on their entire conversation so far today. “So you don't even need to think about it?” she asked with a smile.

“No, I don't. If you want to move in with me I don't think anyone here would mind, and I would be happier.”

“Okay,” she said, her smile widening. “I'll move in here with you.”

“Good.” He kissed her softly then. When he pulled away she yawned slightly. The experience earlier and their lovemaking had taken more out of her than she had expected, and she shut her eyes and curled up into him. He kissed her forehead and began stroking her hair back. As she began to fall asleep she realized that she was happy for the direction things were going, and that for once maybe things would work out after all.


End file.
